Strange days have found us.

Go away, strange days! You suck!

I'm continually impressed by the good cheer of people who are carrying on, performing their duties to get us the goods and services we need, while the rest of us get grumpy with cabin fever. But no stiff upper lips can hide the fact that things are weird.

I had to bring huge major dog Tralfaz to the vet yesterday for his checkup and shots. To my surprise they did not cancel the appointment, but when I pulled up there was a big sign on oak tag saying STOP! All humans were to call the office to announce their arrival and wait outside. Which was fine with me, because Fazzy is always a pain in the ass at the vet's, to the point where I can't keep him in the waiting room. Whining, boofing, barking, vocalizing, fussing, basically acting like a nut. This was faster.

I heard that other people's veterinarians were following the same procedure. And I wondered how long all this will last. Will it take until the last coronavirus victim is recovered or buried? Because that could take a long time.

Suppose we could endure the crisis. Then let's take it a step further. Can we kill off the common cold and influenza the same way?

According to Jamaica Hospital Medical Center in Queens, New York, common cold germs can live on surfaces for seven days, and influenza just 24 hours. If we all stayed away from each other for two weeks and touched only things that were sanitized or boiled, could we completely destroy cold and flu germs?

I guess we'll know next year, when God willing this has all blown over, and the CDC says there's no flu vaccine because there's no flu. How nice that will be!

I know, it's stupid. We've certainly learned that no quarantine is perfect. Most people wouldn't stand isolation for two weeks for something they don't see as a threat. Some rhinovirus would miraculously survive. Some tribe in South America that didn't get the memo would emerge from the rain forest with bad colds. Some creep would keep the virus alive in a test tube and smear it in the subway. It's a ridiculous notion to think we could isolate colds and flu to death.

But wouldn't it be nice if we could wipe out those miserable bugs forever?

P.S.: If you missed last week's big Fred Kindle Book Giveaway, well, I'm sorry. But they're always available and reasonably priced. My books are also available on actual paper, but because everyone in the paper industry is getting out of book paper and into toilet paper, you'll have to pay more for those.