In the supermarket halls
A bin of dog toys calls
A bunch of wiener dogs in Christmas cheer.
They are long and they are grinning
Like they've had too much fun sinning
Full of fluff for teeth and squeaking for the ear.
Let us get one for the puppy!
He's so super-pepper-uppy
These are just the kind of thing that he will use!
He'll nuzzle it and bite it
He will massacre and fight it
And then meanwhile he will not chew on my shoes.
On the morning of the day
As the humans ply their way
Down for coffee and prepare to find their stuff,
Here comes puppy all a-seething
Acting like he still is teething
And it looks like he is fixin' to play rough.
He's a crazy little boy!
Someone quick! Throw him his toy!
Tell him it was sent here to him by some elf!
Let him rip apart and caper!
Let him tear apart the paper!
He can open up the present by himself.
It's the toy that he's undoing
And he sets right into chewing
Like this thing's a meal for hungry carnivores!
There's a foot off and a nose!
There's an ear--and there it goes!
Within minutes there is fluff upon the floors.
Puppy had a bunch of fun
As he ripped apart the one
Big present Santa left him as his treat.
And while he enjoyed the violence
I know I enjoyed the silence
From the satisfied young golden at my feet.
4 comments:
Mrs. Mongo gets a monthly package from Bark Box for our pooch, Madison. It's called the Super Chewer assortment. This month's assortment included a ball covered with fluff and felt to make the ball look just like Rudolph Reindeer. The eyes and red nose lasted just a matter of minutes. In fact, the monthly box rarely lasts the month. Maybe in February?
Our tree was apparently trimmed with dozens of cat toys.
Some dogs just want to annihilate the toys. Nipper was a big fan; Izzy's a little less destructive, but he's catching up.
Bear, we've never had cats (wife's allergic) but I have seen people hang the tree from the ceiling and wind up with cat attacks on it. Chicken wire may be the only way to go.
Excellent doggerel, Fred!
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