Saturday, April 8, 2017

Don't taunt the man who hasn't had his coffee.

I want to thank everyone who chimed in when I mentioned that we were looking for a new coffeemaker in February: Cpl. Rock, Mr. Philbin, et al. You perked me up! (ha)

We decided after much dithering to go with a thermal drip pot from Cuisinart. We wanted to try a thermal pot, in the hope that we could go for a coffee after a couple of hours and not have it taste like it came out of one of those hospital vending machines they used to have, the kind that also dispense hot cocoa and chicken soup from the same nozzle. We wanted a 12-cup pot as well; some makers seem to focus on a 10 or smaller, and we're much too sleepy for a dose that small. We selected Cuisinart as we have had mostly good luck with the Cuisinart line. (What's that? Where did we go on it? No, you're thinking of Cunard, not Cuisinart, silly imaginary person.)

So yesterday I opened the box for the new pot, excited to give the old Mr. Coffee a furlough, and -- hey now! What's this? 



Yes, the top of the handle is missing a little slab of plastic that covers a hollow area. It's not a "some assembly required" thing; there'd be no reason to leave that out, and yes, I did check the box and the instructions to make sure. The piece that was supposed to go here never got there. It's tempting to call it a "you had one job" thing, like this classic:


But it may have been a robo assembly that failed to snap that last piece in place. I could say It had one job. But that's just not as satisfying.

Once I had convinced myself that the gap in the handle was indeed an error and not a slot that something was supposed to connect to, I contacted Cuisinart via e-mail (texting just seemed to brusque). They don't promise an answer within 24 hours like some places, or 48 or 72 or 5,542 hours for that matter. Anyway, I haven't heard back yet.

The Cuisinart pot cost $129,00 (we got it on sale, but still). This is looking cheap, Cuisinart, and I'm not happy. Little things mean a lot. You may have your products chucked together carelessly, but you don't want us knowing that. I demand satisfaction! And coffee!

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