Stroopwafel!

More sugar. 

Interesting; something I'd not heard of.

Choco Stroopwafel?

Hmm.

Who are these mysterious Belgian Boys, and what do they want?

On their Web site they call themselves "Chubby and Skinny, the Troublemakers of Taste." And yet they don't look like rebels, with their bowler hats and curly mustaches.

What can we infer from the name? We know that the European Union is an antidemocratic conspiracy run out of Brussels, Belgium. So these Belgian Boys could be agents of the EU, fattening up Americans with their Choco Stroopwafels.

And I say: Bring. It. On.

I thought this "Belgian Boys" thing might be one of those "little companies" that actually turns out to be owned by a massive conglomerate, the way Kellogg's owns Kashi, and RJR Reynolds owned the Moonlight Tobacco Company, and Anheuser-Busch owns everything... and is itself owned by Anheuser-Busch InBev of Belgium. (Hmm.) But I could only trace the Belgian Boys to a limited liability company called Le Petite Belge, registered in the U.S.

Suspicious?

Oh, yeah.

Worse: Although the one you see here was purchased in a gas station convenience store, it was no cheap piece of junk food; it had a light, crispy waffle, creamy and not tooth-ruining caramel, and rich, delicious chocolate. Obviously part of their plan to break our will.

So I think we need to investigate this more. You start researching the paper trail; I'm going to look more deeply into the ingredients used in these Belgian Boys treats. The secret lies in the Stroopwafel. I'm sure there are clues there if I can just consume---uh, that is, exhume---them.