Monday, October 5, 2020

White chocolate supremacy?

Got a case of the Mondays? Tired of all the fighting and fussing in our society? Well, let's start the week off with some candy! And since we're in October, it's finally appropriate to delve into the Halloween loot. 


Mmm, Reese's White Chocolate and Peanut Butter. But wait! What's this "white créme" stuff? I'm sure I saw these on sale last year, but was nothing about white créme, whatever that is. 

Of course, there were lawyers involved. According to an article in Confectionary News from July 22, 2019, "Consumers filed a complaint in the Eastern District of New York last month alleging that the confectioner was knowingly deceiving consumers. The suit alleges that Hershey has engaged in deceptive trade practices, negligent misrepresentation, fraud and unjust enrichment, as well as breach of express and implied warranty." 

Whoa! Sounds serious! What's all the hubbub, bub?

It's all because "the ingredient deck omits cocoa butter -- the key ingredient in real white chocolate -- which the defendants [I think they mean plaintiffs] claim as misleading."

Well, I think we can all draw the same conclusion from this terrible circumstance -- that our country has too many goddamn lawyers with too much goddamn time on their hands. 

Hershey countered that its wrapper did not say White Chocolate; the regular candy was just called "White Reese's" and still is. However, in response to the lawsuit I suppose, they are now specifying that it is "White Créme" and peanut butter. According to Taste of Home magazine, "Even though it technically isn’t white chocolate, it sure does taste the same."

You ask me, the term "white créme" is a little suspicious on its own. Try not to think about it.

Really, who the hell cares? "Real white chocolate"? White chocolate isn't even real chocolate, so what's the issue? With all the things going on, even all the things that were going on a year ago, we had to waste the court's time on this? If the suit had gone forward, would we have seen commercials about it? "If you or a loved one has been exposed to fake white chocolate, you may be entitled to compensation." Then Spencer and Sheehan, the class-action weenies who brought the suit, would get fifty million bucks and the "injured parties" who signed on would each get a coupon good for one (1) Hershey bar. 

It must be said that the Eastern District of New York courts seem to have a lot of time on their hands as well, working on political hit jobs of the president among other stupid things. Might as well get into a candy imbroglio as anything else. 

But enough of that -- let's get to the important stuff. How does the White Reese's pumpkin taste?

I agree with Taste of Home; not one person in a hundred could tell that "white créme" is white chocolate. My wife, who doesn't like white chocolate, wouldn't like this much either. I did, but I have to say that peanut butter doesn't work as well with the white whatever-it-is than with milk chocolate or even dark chocolate. Peanut butter has a strong flavor, and aside from its sweetness, the white stuff has a mild flavor, so the PB overwhelms it. 

I don't care. It was good. So don't try to get me involved in your class-action lawsuits against Hershey's, you blasted ambulance-chasers. It's fine no matter what the company calls it. Happy Halloween.

3 comments:

Robert said...

The weekly grocery report: Kroger has discounted the Halloween candy already and 30% off of decorations. It's October 5th. Meanwhile Costco has thrown all caution to the wind. The first three center aisles are all about That Holiday, with kids Halloween costumes relegated to the back.

Harrumph!

rbj

Fiendish Man said...

OK, I laughed out loud at the "Goddamn lawyers" part.

About 25-30 years ago, when I was both parentless and childless, I took advantage of the post-Easter candy sale at a local drug store. Now, I have never been a white chocolate fan. It lacks the flavor of milk chocolate, and the relative health benefits of dark chocolate. Some homemade white fudge really turned me off when I was a teenager. But there was this white bunny for 50% off. It wasn't "white chocolate" -- it was called "creamy milk" flavor. Does this thing actually taste like milk in solid form? I bought it, I ate it, and it was delicious. It didn't taste like chocolate...and it barely tasted like milk. It was just sweet. Isn't that the whole purpose of candy? To be sweet? Any flavoring is incidental.

FredKey said...

Robert, BJ's Wholesale is exactly the same way. Sheesh. As for Kroger, maybe Halloween stuff isn't selling as well this year because (at least in Cuomoland) no one knows if trick-or-treating will be outlawed this year.

And I agree, FM: antioxidants be damned, it's all about that sweet, sweet taste.