Hair apparent.

If only dog hair were a useful commodity. I'd have a lucrative side job at the least.

I know I'm a little obsessed on this topic. We knew when we got Nipper, Dog #2, two years ago that we'd be up to our knees in dog hair. Dog #1, Tralfaz, was a big hairy fellow with lots of hair to spare (and share). The second one isn't as big, but seems to have an amazing ability to turn over the stuff. My wife groomed him, removing every loose hair she could, and the very next morning clouds of the stuff were drifting off him. I was petting him on the porch and the summer breeze was carrying little drifts of Nipper out over the grass. It was snowing dog.

Besides choking one vacuum cleaner to death, wearing a second almost out, and testing the limits of the (so far so good) Bissell Pet Hair Eraser, there's not much you can do with dog hair. Even if it's soft and silky, as is particularly the case with Tralfaz's fuzz, you're limited in what you can do.

Not that some folks don't try. There are people who spin yarn from their dogs' hair and knit with it. There's some that will take your collected dog hair and do it for you. A dog blanket that's literally a dog blanket -- what better way to remember Bella after she's crossed the Rainbow Bridge?

And really, is dog hair different than cashmere (goats), angora (bunnies), or alpaca (alpacas)?

Yes, because, dog.

I don't know, there's just something weird about predator fur being used as to keep you warm. Now, if you kill it and skin it like the Nemean Lion, that's different. Plus, Heracles kept the head attached. Made him look mean.

And, naked.

But that's useless to me here. I'm not skinning and tanning something I regard as a pet.

I just can't see any use for all this dog hair. Sure, it would make a great toupée for me, but no way would anyone believe it was real. Too much like... dog hair.

The only way I see it working is as a toupée for Chihuahuas. They get cold. But, they have no money. Alas, another great business model down the drain.