Sunday, June 25, 2017

Fantastic voyage.

Here are some parts of the body that sounds like they came from a bad fantasy novel. All I ask is that if you write the novel using these and make a million dollars, that you send me half.

Name: Femur
What it is: Thigh bone
What it sounds like: Norse hero

Name: The Adenomeres
What it is: Functional unit of the salivary glands
What it sounds like: Femur's people, beset by a curse

Name: Superior Vena Cava
What it is: Wide vein
What it sounds like: Chief of the Adenomeres, who sends Femur on a quest to save his people

Name: Islets of Langerhans
What it is: Regions of the pancreas that produce hormones
What it sounds like: Where Femur's quest takes him

Name: The Sphincter of Oddi
What it is: A muscle valve that controls the flow of digestive juices
What it sounds like: Magic artifact Femur needs to find on the Islets of Langerhans to set the Adenomeres free of their curse

Name: Medulla Oblongata
What it is: Lower half of brain stem
What it sounds like: Mysterious witch woman on the Islets of Langerhans who prophesies big fat trouble for Femur

Name: Urethra
What it is: Tube that connects the bladder to the genitals
What it sounds like: Beautiful tribal princess on the Islets of Langerhans

Name: The Cholecyst
What it is: The gallbladder
What it sounds like: Urethra's tribe

Name: Thorax
What it is: Part of the body that lies between the head and abdomen
What it sounds like: The half-warlock, half-demon beast that steals the Sphicter of Oddi and kidnaps Urethra

Name: The Epithelium
What it is: One of four basic kinds of animal tissues
What it sounds like: Band of tribal elders who blame Femur for the kidnapping of Urethra

Name: Crypt of Lieberkuhn
What it is: A gland found in the epithelial lining of the small intestine and colon
What it sounds like: Where Thorax spirits Urethra and the Sphincter of Oddi to

Name: Submandibular
What it is: A salivary gland
What it sounds like: The hideous monster that answers only to Thorax

"Submandibular Attacks Femur,"
by Frank Frazetta

Name: Auerbach's plexus
What it is: Part of the nervous system
What it sounds like: The mysterious weapon Femur finds that leads him to the Crypt and helps him destroy Submandibular and Thorax

Name: The Fovea
What it is: Part of the eye
What it sounds like: The vessel on which Femur and Urethra depart to bring the blessings of the Sphincter of Oddi back to the Adenomeres

Who says there's no romance in science?

No comments: