Monday, February 20, 2023

Presidents Day sale!

Hello, friends! We're celebrating Presidents Day here at Fredcoin, everyone's favorite cryptocurrency, with an amazing deal! You won't want to miss out on this one! But first, you need to ask yourself some important questions. 

Yes, friends, you need to say to yourself, "SELF! Do I want my wallet to be fat, like Taft? Or scrawny like Madison? Do I want my savings to be piled high like Lincoln? Or be peewee like, er, Madison? Man, Madison was a little dude, wasn't he?"

Well, of course the answer is: You want the big dough! You want to be raking it in like Trump before becoming president, not have to wait like Obama until afterward! 

But, you wonder, how can Fredcoin bring you the big bucks if it's just another form of currency?

See, right there, that's our secret: No one knows. The US Treasury is jammed with people who know a lot about money. Congress and the White House are full of money people. The Federal Reserve is all about the good old US dollar. And how is that working out? Your dollar has more shrinkage than the guys in the Polar Bear Club on New Year's Day. Meanwhile, at Fredcoin, we don't know beans about money, and 1 Fredcoin has remained equal to 1 Fredcoin ever since we started. QED!

And here's our amazing Presidents Day Fred, White, and Blue Sale: Buy 50 Fredcoin for one Grant, and we'll throw in another 20 for one Jackson! We must be nuts to make a deal like that, I know! Or maybe drunk! Oh ho! Which two presidents have a reputation for being prodigious topers? Aaahhhh, there you are!

Once again, I must ask if you want to be smart like our smarty smart presidents (Washington, Lincoln)? Dumb like our big dumbbell presidents (take your pick)? Or even so smart you come all the way around to being stupid again (Wilson)? Of course not! You want to be with the hip crowd! You want Fredcoin!

So remember, my fellow Americans, turn that flimsy US currency into rock-solid Fredcoin! And keep flying the Fred, White, and Blue! 

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