Friday, January 27, 2023

Board of it all.

Today's trash day, and guess what is going out into the garbage and why! 


It's hard to tell, perhaps, from that picture, so I'll explain: It's our ironing board. And the weird angle is because it won't stand up. And it won't stand up because one of the legs snapped off by the hinge bit. And that's why it's going into the garbage. 

And why did it break?

Never iron angry.

Not me, not your level-headed model of coolness in the face of frustration Fred. Who's also a big fat liar. Actually the anger came from my wife, who was trying to iron the big curtains in the family room that had come out of the dryer, and they always seem to fight ironing like it's Ali and the iron is Joe Frazier. 

And she was allllllmost done when the board snapped and hit the floor. Which, as you can guess, just elevated her mood precipitously. 

But it should be noted that this is a pretty old board, as modern stuff goes. How old? Let me pull off the cover and show you the original surface....


That's right -- it was a Crayola-themed ironing board. Why? I am not sure. I just remember when we got married, and our previous roommates had owned the ironing boards in our lives prior to that, and no one puts ironing board on the bridal registry. So one Sunday night -- for some reason I'm certain it was a Sunday night -- we were shopping around and saw this one cheap. At the time, that being the nineties, Binney and Smith was licensing the Crayola name and logo on a lot of things, like stuffed toys and T-shirts. But why an ironing board? 

Well, apparently there are several craft projects that you can do with an ironing board and Crayola products. I suppose this ironing board was a way to promote that. I had plenty of Crayola crayons in my youth, but I promise you, my mom would never have allowed any of them near her iron.

Over the years we got some good use from the board, cheap as it was. In my office days I liked to have a nice pressed shirt -- that, children, was before recent times, when you can show up to work in your nothing but your nacho-stained underpants and no one cares. Often on Sundays I would iron shirts and some pants for the week, and maybe shine up the shoes. It wasn't all that long ago, but I feel like it was an entirely different galaxy from the one in which we live now. 

Well, I'm sorry to see the old board go. It was fun, even if we had to cover up the thin Crayola cover with a more sturdy padded cover with boring ol' flowers on it. I always knew there was a green crayon underneath anyway.

3 comments:

peacelovewoodstock said...

Save that green crayon and put it in your wallet whenever you are traveling! I saw that tip on Lileks so it must be true.

Robert said...

Beat me to it, PLW.

rbj13

FredKey said...

We're gonna need a bigger wallet.