Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Science!

I was excited to see that it's Google Science Fair time again. I've been waiting for this for months.

"It's Your Turn to Change the World," they say. Okay! I think we're agreed that if there's one thing this world needs, it's changing. I'll start by firing every lobbyist in the country.

No, JK! I know, this has to be all Sciencey. And I've worked that out. At the risk of tipping my hand, I'm going to reveal my blueprints for my entry for the Google Science Fair:


Pretty freakin' awesome, non?

I'll explain what it is for the sake of you less-sciencey types: It's an exploding stick of butter. I know, right? It combines two of the things guys love most:

  1. Butter
  2. Exploding things

This is a clear winner, obviously. My concern is that I haven't been 18 years old in a long, long time, and this competition is supposedly for the sub-adult population. I think I can slip in, though, based on the fact that I'm so young at heart. Anyone who looked at my blueprints would agree. "This has to be the work of a child!" they would say.

Then I would step forward, hand out, and say, "Thanks! And instead of the fifty-grand scholarship, just slip me 25 large and we'll call it square."

It's all for the love of Science!
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