Please be seated.

I had a terrific blog entry planned out for yesterday morning, but then I fell down the stairs. 

Son of a bitch, man -- I don't think I'm technically old yet, but the older get you get, the less falling down the stairs is a joke.  

The scenario: Carrying down two lightweight but bulky containers of recycling to the garage, which accesses through the cellar, to participate in the weekly Recycling Kabuki before it all goes in the landfill. Being a manly masculine type with XY chromosomes, I cannot make two trips when it's the slightest bit possible to make one. Yes, I have socks on, the lightweight kind with little grip (there are shoes in the cellar). But no, I have never in two decades plus fallen down these stairs. 

First time for everything, they say.

Would have been nice to
fall down more scenic stairs.

It was pretty spectacular. Empty cans went flying, and I myself thudded two or three times, once with the back of my head, once on my tailbone. Scared the hell out of the dog. Didn't do me a bit of good either.

Those of you who have been hanging around here (God love you) may recall that at the beginning of 2020 I was in the hospital for a couple of days with spinal issues, and before that I cracked my head on the driveway through the miracle of black ice and was dizzy for weeks. So hitting my butt and my head was sort of a twofer. Which would hospitalize me? 

Fortunately, neither. First, I sat on the steps trying to run diagnostics; then I opened my eyes and looked around and had no sign of dizziness. I was in a good deal of pain in what Dave Barry calls the behindular area, but it was not spinal and excruciating. No breaks. 

Australian video commenter Ozzy Man, in his long-running Destination F series, enjoys pointing out when people have landed hard on the coccyx, because coccyx is both difficult and funny to say. Well, I had landed in Destination F, because I bruised that coccyx quite well, and it hurt like the dickens. 

So, looks like it's OTC pain meds and icing for up to four weeks, according to Mount Sinai. Fortunately I've been able to sleep and to work, both of which can be difficult after an injury however stupid. And I have joined a long line of comic characters injuring the tusheroo -- enough that TV Tropes has a whole page dedicated to the art of injuring the butt. 

What have I learned? Maybe to start paying attention to what I'm doing while I'm actually doing it for once in my life. And, despite the risk to my man card, maybe I should consider making two trips. Not saying I will, but I should consider it.