Thursday, January 16, 2020

January thaw.

I think we had our January thaw early, as last weekend we had temperatures in the low sixties. It was wonderful. Felt like a particularly nice St. Patrick's Day, without the excuse to get hammered. The thing is, the January thaw (a term I had never heard before I married an upstater) is not supposed to arrive until about the 25th of the month. I think we misfired our thaw.


A local dogwood I passed already has some buds. That's all wrong, dogwood. I know you bloom early but this is silly. You'll have nothing left for March. Down! Down, boy!

But the saddest sight was this. Oh the humanity!



All those Christmas inflatables, just left to die on the lawn! I counted eleven before I lost heart. What kind of a cruel world is it where uncaring passersby ignore the suffering of our gaseous friends, cast to earth by the heedless sickness of climate change? I'm going to throw myself on the grass with them in solidarity. Fear not, brethren! For I am with you! You have nothing to lose but your... deflatedness!

😢😢😢

Last weekend, friends of mine were saying that the government of New York is so bad that it even made winter leave. That may be as good an explanation as any. After all, our brutal taxes, our one-party state, our legalized abortion up to the time the kid stops being cute, our creeping ban on plastics or anything disposable (except the elderly), our kabuki recycling theater, our acceleration on the road to serfdom, and our new sport of catch-and-release felony are making living here a... Hmm, what's the word I want?


Oh, yeah, that's right.

3 comments:

Mongo919 said...

Brazil - coming to your country soon!

The thaw here has our jonquils coming up and the pear trees starting to bud. Probably gonna have start mowing the lawn in February at this rate!

Fiendish Man said...

Most of the garish lawn displays are gone for another 11 months. There was one in particular that I have observed over the past few years, next to a Rite-Aid. The citizen's small front yard was crammed with slightly-larger-than-human inflatable figures. Olaf from Frozen, Mickey Mouse, and a couple of other things, walking single-file past an enormous inflatable snow globe. My daughter called it "The Parade of Horribles", and I can't think of a more apt term.

FredKey said...

One meme going around at Christmastime was "Let's get faced and go beat up the inflatable decorations!" The problem is, if I got drunk, the inflatables would probably win.