Friday, November 30, 2018

Kick it into high gear!

You're sick of Christmas already?

That's a shame.

Because tomorrow is December and we're kickin' it into high gear!

I was in the supermarket yesterday and it was all holiday-themed music on the PA. I was disgusted to hear a cover of the second-worst Christmas song ever, Paul McCartney's "Wonderful Christmastime." I wanted to find out what idiot would sing that stupid song, so I looked it up when I got home to find that 23 idiots have covered that song to one degree or other. To rub salt in the wound, not five minutes later the PA played the McCartney original. I think it was Mark Steyn who questioned the lyrics:

The choir of children sing their song
They practiced all year long
Ding dong, ding dong
Ding dong, ding dong
Ding dong, ding dong

Who the hell has to practice all year long to sing "Ding dong, ding dong"? Is this a choir of particularly slow children?

Of course, the worst Christmas song of all time is John Lennon's "Happy Xmas (War Is Over)," unless some fool thinks "Imagine," the worst song of all time, is suitable for Christmas. When I hear either song coming on I make Spencer Tracy's transformation to Mr. Hyde look like a walk in the park.

But lest I've left you with a bad taste in your ear, here's a seasonal ditty from another rock star you'll be sure to enjoy. 

 


Bob Dylan is the only Nobel laureate since Linus Pauling to record "Must Be Santa." Some people think Nicolaas Bloembergen was first, but he did "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus."

Merry Christmas!

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