Cartoon Language Academy.

Good mornink, Americanski!

 Are you wishing that learning foreign languages was as easy as watching TV in your underpants while eating cheese? Boy, don't we all! And that's why the Cartoon Language Academy can help!

Yes, the CLA can teach you a foreign language with the help of our shifty language experts from the cartoons! No more fumbling with dusty old books and stupid software that doesn't work right! No more wrestling with parts of speech and vocabulary lists! With the help of our certified cartoon characters, you can be speaking a foreign tongue good enough to pass for a native on an average cartoon in no time at all!

Prof. Badenov, our dean and professor of Russian and Pottsylvanian Languages, says the following: "We are thinkink you would all part with nice green money to attend worthless program, da? Or as they say in English, you want learn foreign language fast?"

Each class comes with a sample phrasebook that will have you speaking the lingo in no time! Here's one from Dr. Badenov's class:

Russian	English
Shurrup you mouth.	Please be silent.
You busybodies have busied your last body.	You have interfered for the last time.
Raskolnikov!	Darn it!
Allow me to introducing myself. I am Boris Badenov, world's greatest no-goodnik.	Allow me to introduce myself. I am Boris Badenov, the world’s finest language instructor.

Here is a sample of some of our other learned professors and the languages they teach:

N. Fatale: Russian, Pottsylvanian, Seductress
S. Gonazales: Mexican
B. Looey: More Mexican
P. Le Pew: French
D. Do-Right: Canadian
Hassan: Arabian
Charlie (dog): Italian
Charlie (human): Chinese
Dexter: German
T. Devil: Tasmanian
Savoir-Faire: Canadian French
C. McBragg: British
Bruno: Russian, Slovakian
Vavoom: Vavoom
H.K. Phooey: Chinese, Scat
A. Nahasapeemapetilon: Swahili, Bengali {CLASS CANCELED}
M. Martian: Martian
Y. Sam: Authentic Frontier Gibberish

Yes, sign up today and be blathering in the tongue of a shifty foreigner by nightfall. That's the Cartoon Language Academy, folks! And remember, as Prof. Vavoom would say, Vavoom.