Last year we got very few trick-or-treaters. The neighborhood was changing; kids who'd grown up there were gone, folks had moved away, houses now held Orthodox families that ignore Halloween and familes of uncertain origin who didn't have kids -- just 23 adults in one house -- or anyway didn't send out any children to get free candy.
Plus, it was very cold and rainy last year. I know, because I sat on the porch by my stupid self waiting to hand out the goodies.
New year, new neighborhood, and this one is packed with kids. I asked around: What size U-Haul box truck should I fill up with Skittles to feed the candy-crazed masses? Ha ha, they said, a 15-footer should do the trick.
Apparently it's quite an operation here in the south. Kids zoom around on scooters and ATVs and in golf carts and expect the adults to be set up at the end of their driveways, handing out goodies. A regular McCandy Drive-Thru.
I think we'll be all right. But I'm not sure. I have 13 sacks of candy in various sizes (from bag o' 20 servings to monster sack o' 160), plus a few packs small toys that can can be split among the bags as filler, plus boxes of lunch-pack cookies that can be hauled out as need be. No kid, no matter how candy crazed, is going to ignore Oreos.
I expect to see kids from all over. Wonder if I'll acually see the two next door. They're pretty young, but their mom will not spreak to us. Really, a month and a half and not a peep, despite seeing each other around mowing and stuff. Sure, I might be a weirdo, but come on. All I ask is that people give me one chance before they hate me. Then they can hate me all they want. (But the older kid waved and said hi.)
One more observation as we barrel toward the big 👻💀day: WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?
"Spooky Ranch"? It took a few years, but kids ultimately rejected Heinz's weird purple, green, etc. ketchup. I can't see them going for diarrhea-colored ranch dressing. If you don't mind how it looks, watch for it in the remainder bin on November 1.
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