Tuesday, July 30, 2024

Colorful writing.


I have a brilliant idea for a one-act play, a drama of romance with four characters. I have only gotten to the notes stage of fleshing out the idea, but I hoped you'd be interested. Maybe you have a billion dollars hanging around and have always dreamed of producing a great play. Well, dream no more! 

This one's got it all -- drama, pathos, comedy, and babes. You couldn't ask for more colorful characters. I call it...

Toner: A Love Story 

Curtain up, and we meet our four players:

🖶 Black, tall, dark, and handsome

🖶 Cyan, a young man with sky-high optimism

🖶 Yellow, pretty but shy and retiring

🖶 Magenta, one hot chick


Cyan and Magenta have been dating for a while, but Magenta is trouble. They met at a Deep Purple concert, and seemed to hit it off. But now she's always running out. He doesn't want to try to control her, and knows he can't, but she doesn't seem to care about his needs. Meanwhile, Black (called Big K) is a little tired of his girl Yellow, who dotes on him but is not exciting. They've gone so far as to ink a prenup, but no wedding date is in sight.  

As the play progresses, we see they are all in one jam or other. Big K is having trouble at work; Cyan is blue because he thinks Magenta is cheating. 

One day Big K meets Magenta and is totally imprinted. "Hey, baby, I'd love to get your portrait," he says. 

"I think you want me in landscape, big boy," she teases.

"Yeah, girl, once you've had Black you never go back." 

“Ooh, baby, you can drive my cartridge.”

Yellow is scared that her boyfriend might be straying, especially when she gets a call from her friend Dot that Big K was seen collating with some floozie. 

Cyan, meanwhile, goes looking for Magenta with laser-focused intensity. He hears about Big K, and goes to the man's apartment, only to find Yellow all alone. 

Cyan and Yellow talk, and realize their romantic partners are probably cheating on both of them. They are green with jealousy. Suddenly Big K arrives. Cyan accuses him of stealing his girl. Big K tries to throw him out. Black and Cyan fight until they are black and blue. 

Suddenly Magenta shows up. She says she's had it with both of these men, and runs off. Yellow scoffs: “Who shot her out of a cannon?” Big K calls after her, saying "Black loves matter!" Cyan storms away in anger and Yellow follows him. 

Cyan and Yellow cool off in the park. She says he should get some Epsom salts on his bruises. He says maybe they should hook up to spite the cheaters. They go back to his apartment. He makes some food (steak with HP sauce), but she's a vegetarian. She turns on some romantic music -- but it's Michael Bolton (Cyan: "I hate that guy!"). Nothing works -- they just have no chemistry. 

Meanwhile Big K finds Magenta, drowning her sorrows at the Copycat Lounge. She confesses that she really loves Cyan, but she knows she's no good for him. She's a bloody mess. He sees there's no future with her, so he leaves. Everybody is low. 

The next day, Big K goes to Yellow's place, begging her to take him back. She agrees, but she's more bold now and demands respect. Meanwhile, Magenta goes to Cyan's place to tell him she loves him, but it can never come out right. They have nothing in common. He points out that they're both in love, both enjoy classic rock, and both people of color, and he believes they can make it work, even if the margins are slim. 

At the end, in a real Kodak moment, everyone embraces. Curtain! 

Pretty awesome, right? I think we can get some backing and a theater to give this a go. And if not, see how long Playbill lasts with only blank pages. Mwah ah ah!

3 comments:

technochitlin said...

Printer problems again, Fred?

Stiiv said...

All four characters now require a subscription.

rpm1200 said...

Oh, Brother…