Nothing but love songs.

With Valentine's Day approaching, the topic of love songs is close to everyone's heart. Now, what constitutes a great love song differs from person to person. For one person, it might be "As Time Goes By." For another, "Melancholy Baby." For another, "Yakkity Sax." There's no accounting for taste.

I seem to recall Mark Steyn, in discussing the womanizing career of brilliant Broadway composer Richard Rodgers, pondering how a man like that could write such stirring and beloved love songs as "Some Enchanted Evening" and "If I Loved You." And it's a good question. Many of our favorite romantic songs have been written by people who, in their personal lives, barely seem able to muster the affection to stay with one other human for more than eighteen minutes. And yet they can write the words, music, or both pledging love eternal.

Here's a chart I whipped up of twenty favorite songs, often heard at wedding receptions, and how the songwriters themselves scored in the game of love:

There are a number of things we can learn from this chart. The first is, if tempted to marry Pattie Boyd, maybe give it further consideration. For another, divorce can break up a great songwriting team. For a third, Lionel Ritchie has a lot to answer for. Fourth, just because a guy is named Love doesn't mean he's good at keeping it going. And finally, Bruno Mars may have been less than serious in his request to join in wedded bliss.

Now, you may object. You may note that I have my facts wrong here. It's possible; I don't know music trivia at this microscopic a level and may have screwed up the details. You may note that this skirts over the details, like the sad cases behind many of the divorces, sometimes happening against the will of the songwriter. I'll grant you that, too. You may wonder why I didn't include the thrice-divorced Billy Joel. I just forgot him, but yeah; ditto for others I didn't think of. You may be a big fan of Pattie Boyd and think I'm giving her the Yoko Ono treatment here. We can take that up another time.

But mainly, you may point out that I'm cherry-picking. After all, other songsters have had very long-lasting marriages. Irving Berlin had two marriages and outlived both wives; his first wife died less than a year into the marriage in 1912, and his second marriage began in 1926 and ended with her passing in 1988. And Neil Sedaka is still married to the same woman, Leba, that he married in 1962 -- unlike the Captain and Tennille, who had a big hit with his "Love Will Keep Us Together," but it did not for them beyond 39 years.

So sure, there are examples of love-song writers who stayed in love. But the question is, why don't they ALL stay in love? Aren't they the love experts?

Well, maybe not. We know some people are addicted to drama; it doesn't mean that they aren't really feeling those dramatic moments when someone hurts them or they fall in love (or lust). They are 100% sincere... while it lasts. And while it lasts they may compose something great. Further, these hit songwriters have a knack for putting tunes and/or words together in an expressive way that the rest of us can't, which also means that they can use these talents to pump up the volume on what may for them be a passing mood. Were they not music writers they might have been salesmen.

I guess in the end we must always remember that musicians, like actors, are excellent at appearing to be something they are not, and it may be safe to assume they're worse than they look, especially regarding matters de l'amour.

Unlike novel writers. We always mean it.