Making a sausage of Thanksgiving.

Or in other words, making it the wurst.

If you thought that the CDC's recommendations for Halloween would make it the worst Halloween ever, as I did, then you'll be certain that the CDC's recommendations about Thanksgiving vis-à-vis the Chinese Death Virus will make it just terrible.

Here's how you're supposed to celebrate your all-American freedom and the blessings of Almighty God: 

Attending a Gathering

Make your celebration safer. In addition to following the steps that everyone can take to make Thanksgiving safer, take these additional steps while attending a Thanksgiving gathering.

• Bring your own food, drinks, plates, cups, and utensils.
• Wear a mask, and safely store your mask while eating and drinking.
• Avoid going in and out of the areas where food is being prepared or handled, such as in the kitchen.
• Use single-use options, like salad dressing and condiment packets, and disposable items like food containers, plates, and utensils.

Hosting a Thanksgiving Gathering

If having guests to your home, be sure that people follow the steps that everyone can take to make Thanksgiving safer. Other steps you can take include:

• Have a small outdoor meal with family and friends who live in your community.
• Limit the number of guests.
• Have conversations with guests ahead of time to set expectations for celebrating together.
• Clean and disinfect frequently touched surfaces and items between use.
• If celebrating indoors, make sure to open windows.
• Limit the number of people in food preparation areas.
• Have guests bring their own food and drink.
• If sharing food, have one person serve food and use single-use options, like plastic utensils.

There are more, lots more. My favorite is to have everyone bring his own food, utensils, plates, and cups. Our public health scolds love to remind us that the important thing is that we are together, despite the restrictions. They'd say the same thing if we were required to sit around in asbestos-removal suits and stay in different rooms and scream to each other. These were the same people, I remind you, who made us stay away from dying family and not even attend the funeral, but thought it was fine for thousands to pour into the streets to protest the killing of career criminals, or to loot, or to honor the dead as long as it wasn't some peasant like us.  

I got my turkey at the store yesterday and I have never seen so many frozen birds under 13 pounds. The Butterball case was at least half full of "Li'l Butterballs," birds that weigh as little as six and no more than 11 pounds. Butterball and the supermarkets are assuming that the public will be eating alone. 

We have plenty of native New York turkeys,
but most of them are in Congress.

And if you think that the actual governmental restrictions in place in your state are not too restrictive yet, then A) You don't live in the Kingdom of Newsom and B) You haven't seen this (from November 11): 

                        COVID-19 Surges Threaten to Overwhelm Hospital Staff

As the United States continues to set records for coronavirus cases, the inevitable has been the result: Hospitalizations, too, are hitting higher levels than at any other time in the pandemic.

Nearly 62,000 people were hospitalized with COVID-19 in the U.S. on Tuesday, more than ever before, according to the COVID Tracking Project. 

Beds filled as new COVID-19 cases rose 20% across the United States last week. The number of hospitalized COVID patients shot up 14% November 5, straining hospital resources and overworked staff.

Across the country, states have been slammed hard with new COVID cases, overwhelming local hospitals. In the Texas city of El Paso, officials are setting up an alternate care facility to help relieve medical centers.

The Northeast appears next, with surges in new COVID-19 cases in all six New England states, according to The Boston Globe....

Seems like spring is in the air again, isn't it? Spring 2020, that is. 

I heard some dumbbell on the radio claiming that here in New York, Gov. Sonny Corleone will be reluctant to shut down everything again because it might make him look bad after touting his wonderful job at handling the crisis in his new book about leadership. If by leadership he means wreck the economy, waste precious medical resources, blame others, and "decrease the surplus population" a la Scrooge, you bet. If leadership = dumb bastard, he's a freaking Napoleon. Besides, Cuomo is looking to sail off back to Washington with the Biden administration, so he could not care less. He'll probably see to it that we get the full lockdown business sometime in the next two weeks, is my guess. 

As I noted last Tuesday, COVID fatigue is a real thing and is taking a terrible toll on Americans, maybe worse than the disease itself. If people get too crazy to give a good goddamn about getting sick anymore, then we will really see the feathers fly.