Killer Moth!

Had the dogs out to the dog park the other morning so they could collapse all day afterward. Tough life, my dogs have. When we got home I felt a bizarre itching on my leg. Like something was fluttering in there...

Being very aware of the danger of ticks, I smashed whatever it was in the fabric as hard as I could. Then I looked. 

How the hell did a moth fly up the leg of my new jeans? And one of those big moths that look like they're made of sawdust and pig fat. I know I had been strolling in the wooded part of the park, where it was ten degrees cooler, so I guess one could have shot up my leg then, but why? How? Not like I was wearing bellbottoms. It made me want to run out and get a pair of those skinny leg jeans the kids were wearing, except I'd look like an olive on toothpicks.

Dopey moth. No wonder I almost flunked them.

Of course this entry was named after the old Batman enemy Killer Moth, who debuted in 1951 as an anti-Batman. As the police could call Batman with the Bat-Signal, criminals who'd promised Killer Moth a cut could signal him if they ran into trouble and he would save them from arrest. I've always had a fondness for villains who are a kind of dark version of the good guys -- Professor Zoom, Sinestro, Bizarro, the Crime Syndicate -- and for a long time Killer Moth served that role. Then, sometime in the 1990s, they decided to make him an idiot and a loser, and then into a monster called Charaxes. I think it all started when someone at DC said, "Moths are silly and weak! What's he doing, chewing holes in sweaters? Har har har."

HA! That's what you think, fictional idiot comics editor. The southern flannel moth caterpillar, or puss moth, is venomous, for one. "The most common places to be stung are the hands, arms, and feet, with symptoms of envenomation ranging from painful to severe," says the invaluable Nature's Poisons. "Pain is obviously the first and most common symptom, but can also include swelling, nausea, headache, chest pain, and shortness of breath. In more serious cases, shock-like symptoms and seizures occur, requiring hospitalization." So yeah, it rarely happens, but in its larval state this moth can straight-up kill you.

Further north, the browntail moth caterpillar "can cause a severe rash or respiratory issues for those who encounter them. These hairs are easily encountered once they become airborne." It's got ranged weapons, people.

So does this mean that Batman should have instead fought the Killer Caterpillar, since they seem most dangerous in the larval form? Well, no, since flying makes moths cooler, but Killer Moth could have had a girl sidekick called Cate Rpillar. Just spitballing here.

Anyway, keep calm, and don't let anything fly up your pants. That is all.