What I learned from movies.

🎥 Children are more intelligent than adults, and more resourceful

🎥 A clever child can beat an experienced adult man in combat

🎥 So can a woman--any woman

🎥 Picking a fight is a great way to resolve family problems; screaming at each other is healthy

🎥 More men died as a result of Joe McCarthy than as a result of Pickett’s Charge

🎥 All authority is corrupt, except for vigilantes (who willfully break the law)—especially if they wear costumes

🎥 Everyone decent person in the past, in any era or location, secretly believed in the exact same things Hollywood in the 21^st century believes in, or would agree if they knew about them

🎥 DNA can be identified within an hour by any city police force

🎥 Silencers silence guns so they sound like a flea fart

🎥 You can do everything better when you’re angry

🎥 Fast hammering on a keyboard is the best way to hack networks

🎥 Girls will and ought to sleep with you on the first date unless you're a catastrophic loser

🎥 Crazy people are more knowledgeable, perceptive, and wise than noncrazy people

🎥 Drinking continuously makes you fun and doesn't hamper your activities, especially if it's important

🎥 Drugs, either

🎥 And you can sober up enough to perform surgery or something with just a slap on the face and a bucket of water

🎥 Any difficult task can be accomplished quickly with a pop tune and a montage

🎥 The capture of vicious criminals is best accomplished by rogue cops working alone or with one faithful partner

🎥 And may involve the destruction of large amounts of public property

🎥 Best friends and lovers start by hating each other, every time