Sunday, September 10, 2023

Apples of crabbiness.

It's crabapple time again in the ol' orchard! Come on down and bring your crabbiest friends!


Okay, that's like the one crabapple tree I know of in town. It's on the yard of a house that's more than sixty years old, and since it looks like the only such tree on the property, I would guess it was planted on purpose as an ornamental tree. The crabapple, despite its cross name, is a pretty tree when flowering.

In my childhood, my grandmother's little house had some crabapples around the neighborhood, and we were told that they were not edible. That's not strictly true, but the crabapple is known to be very tart, more suitable for jellies and cider. 

We kids of course found the crabapple most suitable for throwing at each other, because boys are dumb about things like that. You could usually ping one off a kid without causing too much damage, and I speak as the pingee as well as the pinger. Still, I'm glad we had no proto-Randy Johnsons in our family. 

The Latin name for the plant and its various species is much more pleasant than CRABapple. Malus floribunda, for example, is one of the most desirable crabapples for its flowers. But how did an appealing tree with a somewhat useful fruit get such a grumpy name? 

It seems to have been the name for a wild tree going back to the middle ages -- the crab part, anyway, coming from Nordic languages, the apple added later for wild trees that bore these fruit. Although some say it's the "wild fruit" part that was the crab. It's a little obscure. It doesn't seem to be related to the crustacean, who got his name from the Germanic for claw, descended from the word for scratch. Or is it? Because according to Ancestry, the name Crabbe (as in Larry "Buster") came from the "German Dutch and Flemish: metonymic occupational name for a fisherman from Middle Low German krabbe Middle Dutch crabbe '(sea) crab'." So if the name Crabbe (or Crabb) comes from the crab, from the same languages at the same time, how can there be no connection between the crab tree and the crab crustacean? 

And I must say, I've known more crabs (the people) than Crabbes (the people) or crabs (the animal) or even crabs (the fishermen). Undoubtedly the crab one knows at the office gets his or her appellation from the armored sea animal, not known for its cuddly nature. 

That's what I mostly knew of as crabs when I was kid. Lucy Van Pelt from Peanuts was known for her crabby nature. Crabby was a common word then; less so now, a few decades on. I don't know why. It's still useful. I think we all sense the difference between someone who is crabby and someone who is just grumpy; the former is more likely to be looking for a fight, the latter wants only to be left alone. 

I'm not sure why the word in this sense has fallen into disfavor, unless it's because of its association with the famous crab lice. That might make someone crabby. So might getting pelted (or Van Pelted) with crabapples. It might make one as crabby as a crustacean. And speaking of crustaceans, the Asian crabtrees are among the prettiest floral varieties. But not if crushed. Being a crushed Asian would make them crabby. So it's all connected, somehow. Or is it?

5 comments:

  1. I'm so confused, it makes me crabb- wait-...

    I'll just go van pelt someone and feel better.

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  2. We had crabapple WARS! 20-30 kids involved.

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  3. I went down the crabbit hole on this one.

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  4. I planted a Macintosh tree in the vicinity of two crabs. Crabintosh apples are pretty good. The tree eventually overproduced and fell over after getting soaked with rain. I miss that tree.

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