Friday, September 4, 2020

Things are hoppin'!

As with last week, I reached a point this week where everything cascaded on me at once. That was Thursday. It started at 1:36 a.m., when large economy-size dog Tralfaz decided he had to go to the bathroom. We discourage this kind of thing, but what can you do? He really had to go.

The broken sleep was worse than usual, because the break was wide. I had trouble getting back to dreamland. So not only was it one of those days that are often called One Of Those Days, but I also faced it semi-exhausted, tired enough to feel sick. Fortunately, I was not actually sick and tired; just tired.

To make this lame blog post up to you, I want to introduce you to my newest pet. His name is Galileo Hammersmith Holyoke Snord. G. Hammersmith for short.


He is a frog, about the size of a quarter. I saw him Wednesday night on the walkway while leading smaller family-size dog Nipper out to use the lawn. G. Hammersmith was minding his own business, but since he was on my property, I declared him to be mine. He is a clever chap, whose interests include snowboarding, electric trains, and the history of avocado farming. He used to sell for Amway but switched to Tupperware. He thinks The Big Sleep is good but not as good as The Maltese Falcon. He feels that pale yellow is a good color on him. He prefers Mary Ann to Ginger, Bailey to Jennifer, and Miriam to Nancy. He can't golf, but he likes to watch it on TV. Also, he leaped into the grass and vanished a second after I took this photo.

Farewell, G. Hammersmith! Thank you for the many seconds of joy you brought us. We shall miss you. May the lawn mowers of life never darken your lily pad.

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