Needful things.

"The Necessary"

by Frederick Key

When winter hits

And makes us all sad

The freezing cold makes us feel awfully bad

Four little things

Stop us being dead:

Toilet paper, milk, eggs, and bread

Quick! To the store!

We mustn’t be late!

Open at seven, sold out by eight

Those magical things

That save us from dread:

Toilet paper, milk, eggs, and bread

“Four little things

We can’t go without!”

Shoppers pushing their carts will all shout

“Keeping us clean

And even well fed!

Toilet paper, milk, eggs, and bread!”

Gather them up

Through aisles we race

Punch the other guys right in the face

They get in your way

They make you see red!

Toilet paper, milk, eggs, and bread

Don’t dawdle now

It’ll all be your fault

If we get stuck ’cause you had to buy salt

Just focus on

The quartet instead:

Toilet paper, milk, eggs, and bread

Get to the line

You can take the express

You certainly got just ten items or less

Remember the thing

Your ol' mama said:

"Toilet paper, milk, eggs, and bread!"

Jam in the car

And stomp on the gas

We got what we need and we’re gonna haul ass

Only some tracks

Will show that we fled

Toilet paper, milk, eggs, and bread

Back to the house

And hunker on down

While winter’s wide paintbrush whitens the town

Our stuff is secure

That’s using your head!

Toilet paper, milk, eggs, and bread

The wind it is raging

Pelts us with sleet

Time to snuggle up under the sheet

We’ll ride out the storm all cozy in bed

Toilet paper, milk, eggs, and bread