Mallow mood.

I haven't done a "Thing I Shouldn't Eat" post in a while, but don't think that's because I've eaten only health food. Perish the thought! I've had my share of junk, but no interesting junk. 

This is kind of interesting. 

Smash Mallow is a Sonoma Brands company from California with Monument Valley-style graphics. It makes gourmet marshmallows for sale through retail shops, in bags as seen here. This is risky, because gourmet marshmallows are not considered stable enough to store for a significant length of time. Store brands last six to eight months unopened, two to four months after opening. Gourmet marshmallows? Three weeks, tops. I'm serious. I worked on a marshmallow cookbook (nope, not kidding), and the author, who owns a marshmallow shop, says to store your homemade marshmallows for no more than three weeks. That would barely be enough time to get onto supermarket shelves.

Smash Mallow is willing to take that chance.

I don't know if their products would be considered artisanal level, like the ones by that cookbook author. But I really don't know why store-bought marshmallows last more than three weeks. They contain tetrasodium pyrophosphate, which is not a preservative but a "whipping agent." Smash Mallow's mallows don't, nor do they have any other alphabet-soup names. How do they stay fresh? Maybe their thick airtight package. I don't know if they have the same shelf life as your basic Campfire or Jet-Puffed chewball, but perhaps not.

But what they miss in shelf life they make up with flavors! These include Candy Cane, Strawberries & Cream, Pumpkin Pie, Root Beer Float, Cookie Dough, Coconut Pineapple, Sugar Cookie, and Mint Chocolate Chip, shown here.

It was quite the tasty marshmallow, nice mint flavor, good chocolate chips. I did not get the feeling it would be improved by dangling it over a campfire until blackened, but I suppose someone could try. I would not melt them over the sweet potatoes at Thanksgiving. I would recommend Smash Mallow's Cinnamon Churro for that. (In fact, their brief Recipes page has instructions for Sweet Potato Fries & Cinnamon Churro Dip. Elsewhere they recommend Coconut Pineapple on your yams.) I did try the Cinnamon Churro and liked it, but not as much as the clean taste of the Mint Chocolate Chip.

A marshmallow is simply sugar and gelatin, and seldom gets any respect. Yes, marshmallows are bad for our teeth and our waistlines, but they are a low-fat, low-calorie sweet snack compared to everything else out there.

I am glad that we are entering the era of the artisanal marshmallow, because why not? It's a sign of economic vitality. When things get bad, as the old economists say, the artisanal marshmallows are the first thing to go. (NOTE: No old economists say that.) So much of what we do these days is fighting and complaining, when really everything is pretty good. We need more cohesion, and marshmallows may just be sticky enough to help.

(But not the vegetarians and vegans -- Smash Mallow uses bovine gelatin, i.e., cow bones and such. I guess we have to start fighting again....)