Cleaning up this town.

Need something superhero themed to amuse the kids? This looks like a job for SUPERMARKET!

Tucked in with the Mr. Bubble and the Johnson's Baby Wash is Crazy Foam, an aerosol body wash/shampoo/conditioner that I vaguely recall from my childhood. Apparently it went away in the 1990s, but is back now and as much fun as ever. Maybe more!

Well, everyone's in love with Wonder Woman again, following the success of the feature film earlier this year. Let's try that one.

Uhhhh....I know comics are what they are now, but that's a lot of cleavage for a product meant for the preschooler crowd. At least I think it is meant for the tots among us. That big hole where the mouth should be---I mean, I know I have a tendency to see potential Rule 34 situations, but the thing looks like it was the design for a prurient inflatable doll, IYKWIM (AITYD).

Well, let's try the soap. 

Okay, well, the soap isn't helping.

For the record, as an adult the soap is not so great. It is missing some key ingredient (sodium laureth sulfate, perhaps? It has sodium lauryl sulfate, though) that makes you feel like you're getting clean, although once done you actually do feel clean. I have no idea what I just said either. It's like with glycerin soap; gets you clean but without the lather you feel like you have to work twice as hard. For the kids, though, it's perfectly adequate to get the little stinkers clean. As Fran Lebowitz famously noted, "Even when freshly washed and relieved of all obvious confections, children tend to be sticky." Well, giving them some Crazy Foam might make them more eager to wash themselves, so that's something. Plus, it smells like bubble gum, which---

Uh-oh! Wonder Woman! What's wrong! She looks sick! Quick, the toilet's right there!

Phew. Another close call for Wonder Woman!

Now, in fairness, this Wonder Woman is a tie-in to the upcoming Justice League movie; you can get a less-cleavagey Wonder Woman from Crazy Foam's "DC Comics Originals" line, which features the characters as they tended to look in the 70's.

The Joker seems like he's really enjoying this gig, though, doesn't he?

Next time we'll see how supermarket life embarrasses other superheroes. Spider-Man string cheese, perhaps?

I guess that's not so bad, unless Peter Parker is lactose intolerant. But it does make me think of him shooting cheese from his webshooters, which... No, never mind.