Wash day.

A lot of people hate doing laundry, but I like it. I like getting a pile of fresh, clean clothing at the end of the chore. I like knowing that my favorite shirts and pants are once more ready for action. I like knowing that I'm not about to run out of underpants. I like the fact that the machines do 90% of the work.

Take it away, machines!

Seriously, as household chores go, laundry is no big deal. I wish the lawn mower would do 90% of that chore, but no, I always have to be right with it the whole time, holding its hand, so to speak. I wish anything would do 90% or even 50% of the windows or bathrooms. With laundry you just stick it in one machine, then cram it in another, and your work comes at the end, when everything is clean and smells nice. Some stuff just goes up on hangers, no folding needed. Why is this so hard?

There was a time when laundry was not so easy, and Mondays were devoted to it. Hand-scrubbing, hand-wringing, hanging out on the line, where it might get rained on or attacked by birds or be swiped by some colorful hobos -- that was real work. No wonder men had disposable paper collars. (You can still get them, actually, if you have a compatible shirt.)

At one time in my former apartment-dwelling life we did use a laundry service, which is a little embarrassing for a private person like me. It's fine to use a dry cleaner for shirts and suits and such, but no one gets underwear dry cleaned. I was never happy going to the laundry to pick up my clean underwear. I always had that feeling they were thinking things like That's the guy who got Strawberry Nesquik stains on his tighty whities. Wonder how he did that. Heh heh heh.

Prior to that, in my swinging bachelor days, I went to the Laundromat. There were a few in town that I favored -- this one had large machines, this one was quiet, this one was close to home -- but my favorite was right near a sports bar. Drop your clothes in a machine and go next door to watch the game; between drinks run back and make sure no one is stealing your clothes and that things are proceeding properly. The time went fast.

But on the whole I prefer having the machines here in the house, where I can take care of my business while they take care of theirs. Plus, at home, no one tries to shut down the shop while my clothes are still damp. Oooh, I hated when that happened.