Saturday, September 12, 2015

Not a preview; a leftover.

It is a truth universally blah blah blah that a box of tissues in the bathroom is the only box of tissues in the house that gets dusty. Less likely so if it's a box in the bathroom in which ladies apply their war paint, but still the only one that may acquire dust.

This is embarrassing:


And no, it's not in the war paint room.

The box was opened last December, as you might suppose, and there it sits. I've been known to pack such things up along with the Christmas decorations and stow them until the following year, but I didn't think it would last this long.

The fact is, you just don't spend that much time sneezing in the can. When you are spending a significant amount of time there, you are showering, in which case tissues are not an option, or easing your nature---and if you sneeze in that position, or go nasal spelunking, or whatever it is you do (don't ask, don't tell), you've got a whole roll of tissues in easier reach. Ten months after it was opened, there it remains. Getting dusted once in a while.

I've been known to get other seasonal and novelty paper items. Not toilet paper; that would be disgusting. I'm talking about paper plates, napkins, paper towels.

Yeah, I got 'em. Sue me.

They never last too long.

There aren't many tissues left in the box, so it makes sense to just keep it there in the can. My luck I'll use the last one on Thanksgiving Day. But if it lasts until we're in the Christmas season, will I be able to resist the temptation to replace it with another Christmas-themed tissue box? Will I have learned my lesson? Should I bother replacing it at all?

See, this is why you need to check in with this blog daily. The suspense grips you like nothing else.

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